Education - Sat, 16 Jan 2021 15:37:16 +0000 Joomla! - Open Source Content Management en-gb Ph.D.

I think Ph.D. is nothing but a PROCEDURE. All procedures in India were laid down by Lord McCaulay during the rule of East India Company. Lord McCaulay was himself not a Ph.D. My understanding of Ph.D. is that Ph.D. holder has invented/discovered/quantified a hitherto unknown phenomenon. But for Ph.D. you need a guide ! eh? Guide? If you are going to invent / discover / quantify, something which was never done before, or you want to go somewhere where NO MAN HAS GONE BEFORE, why do you need a guide? If the guide has himself not been there (of course, by the very definition of Ph.D., he hasn’t), how can he guide someone else to reach there? It is like a goonga telling an andha to teach a langda how to walk! Everybody knows Archimedes Principle. Was Archimedes Ph.D.? Did Archimedes follow any procedure? He only ran naked to the King shouting, "EUREKA ! EUREKA !". Ha ! If I run naked to University, with my helmet in my hand, will I get Ph.D.? We all know Pythagoras Theorem. Was Pythagoras Ph.D.? We all know Gravity. We all know Newtons Laws of Motion. Did Newton have a Ph.D.? No! Then what’s the big deal about Ph.D.?

]]> (Dilip Bam) Education Thu, 07 Nov 2013 07:15:58 +0000
MBA admission in best college in Pune


1. Our full page admision notification of Sri Balaji Society is expected to appear in Times of India tomorrow. Please have a look and spread the message in your informal circle.

2. Also an article reflecting my thoughts on the management education in India will be appearing in the same Times of India. Please share the same with your friend circle. Please also inform your parents. It is appearing all over India tomorrow.
]]> (Dilip Bam) Education Tue, 27 Nov 2012 10:24:28 +0000
Chetan Bhagat’s Revolution 2020 == MUST READ

Chetan Bhagat makes superb use of metaphors, alliterations, and excels in word craft. His narration is catchy and flow is racy. I finished the book in one sitting. All this is there is his earlier books also. What makes REVOLUTiON 2020 different is RESEARCH. I am not talking about the research on Bansal and other coaching classes of Kota, some of which Chetan himself might have attended to get into IIT (I am guessing). I am talking about his research on CORRUPTiON! 

First and foremost Anna Hazare should immediately read this book. If ANNA cannot read English, Chetan should personally go to Anna’s Village and read it to him in Hindi. I am willing to go with Chetan – I speak Marathi. Secondly all students (and their parents) aspiring to do, or already doing, any course such as engineering, BBA, MBA etc, should read this book. It very meticulously exposes the murky underbelly of the politico—bureaucrat nexus. It shows the reader, that corruption in India is not just corruption, it is DESiGNER CORRUPTiON! The system is designed for corruption. He shows how UGC, AiCTE, University affiliation, and all other attendant formalities and permissions are managed! And Chetan manages to beautifully elucidate each process flawlessly. He should. He is from one of the top two MBA institutes in India. 

I am myself from IIT from a time before Chetan was born or Bansal came on the scene. I am also MBA from the other of the top two MBA institutes mentioned above which existed before Chetan’s institute was born. Today I am visiting faculty at a dozen MBA institutes in Pune: Being visiting faculty, I am not involved in dealing with the sarkari babus, but from my conversations with directors of the institutes where I teach, I know that every word Chetan has written is true. 

Chetan is a master at narrating boyfriend-girlfriend shenanigans and making things juicy. Though the love triangle between Gopal, Aarti and Raghav is fairly hackneyed, Chetan has handled it with great elan and would keep youngsters with high testosterone levels titillated. Chetan knows his target audience and he targets them very effectively. 

But one thing Chetan has not done: He has given no solution to the designer corruption existing. Maybe I am expecting too much. If ANNA cannot do anything (at least not yet), what can Chetan do? 

The second thing which sounds improbable is the transformation of Gopal in the end. The only other transformation of this kind I know is the conversion of ANGULiMAAL (the dacoit) to a man of peace by The Buddha. 

I don’t see any Buddha in the story. If I was Gopal, I wouldn’t do what he did. Unless the Dalai Lama preached to me.

]]> (Dilip Bam) Education Sun, 19 Aug 2012 23:18:24 +0000
AiCTE withdraws approval from Sri Balaji Society.

Kindly note: I have put this up on my own website (not in SBS Debate Forum) bkoz I don’t want SBS and Bala Sir to be further victimized due to my writings. For what I write on my own website, 0nly I am personally responsible. Bala Sir has nothing to do with it. He is not responsible for what DilipBam thinks or says. 

If Bharat Sarkar does not like what I have written on my own website, they may take action against me, but they cannot touch Bala Sir. 

Before I go further, let me state that HARVARD is not AiCTE approved! Ha! Does HARVARD need AiCTE approval? 0r does AiCTE need HARVARD approval? XLRi is approved by AiCTE, but does XLRi need AiCTE approval? Or does AiCTE need XLRi approval? 

Eh? Who is AiCTE? What is AiCTE? What is the full form of AiCTE? Let me explain: 

Once upon a time there was an ORiGiNAL Ian Fleming written James Bond book and movie named GOLDFiNGER, in which the Arch-villian was a man named Ernst Strav0 Blofeld. His name in the m0vie was Auric Goldfinger. 

He had an organization named CRiME! The full form of the acronym was 

Council for Revenge intimidation Murder & Extortion! 

So, what is the full form of AiCTE? It is 

All India Council of Terrorism & Extortion! 

Fair enuff. But everybody knows AiCTE is necessary. I know many so called MBA institutes in Pune and elsewhere which exist with some kind of building (or room), but hardly any syllabus, any classes, any exams or any defined program or schedule. About a dozen MBA institutes closed down in Pune this year bkoz not enuff students. I myself teach in many institutes and I know the situation first hand. 

However, let us recognize one fact: “Gehoon ke saath ghun bhi pissa jaata hai!” This is law of nature and even God cannot go against Law of Nature! So, since there are less number of Golden Goose Institutes (who lay golden eggs==employable students), AiCTE is trying to target those Goose who still have the capacity to lay golden eggs==SBS! 

Gabbar Singh says: “Ab tera kya hoga Kaaliya?” 

DilipBam says: “Ab tera kya hoga Juniors?” 

People are panicking bkoz AiCTE approval has been withdrawn. 

Is AiCTE==Gabbar Singh? 

My advice is: DO NOT PANiC! AiCTE approval is no big deal bkoz even HARVARD is not AiCTE approved. As one of the seniors wrote on SBS Alumni India & Abroad: “get a job and prosper in the corporate world”. That is all you need and want. Not having AiCTE approval may not be able get you a SARKARi job. But how many sarkari jobs are available? How many students want sarkari job? How important is sarkar? 99% of our placements are in corporate who don’t care for AiCTE. They only care for EXCELLENCE, which Bala Sir creates. Do you think Narayan Murthy, Anil, Mukesh or Ratan care for sarkari thappa or for excellence? 0f course excellence! Which Bala Sir produces. 

Gentlemen: We stand on our own merit. SBS is a brand that shines bkoz of Bala Sir and the hard work that he does. 

Do not panic. Tell your parents not to worry. Placements chaloo hain and I am sure all seniors will get placed by 28 Feb.2012. 

And AiCTE can shift its 0ffice to Timbuktu. I have been to Timbuktu and have also found a building in which AiCTE can have its 0ffice. (photo attached). The rent is just 1% of what they have to pay in Delhi. And AiCTE will be more effective in Timbuktu bkoz it will be manned by Tuaregs who carry AK47 guns and shoot before they talk. 

When I graduated from XLRi almost 40 EARs ago, there was no AiCTE. Still I got an excellent job. So who needs AiCTE? What is sarkari thappa worth? I believe sarkari thappa is based on corruption. You pay munny, you get sarkari thappa. 

On Wednesday 29.December 2010, The All India Council for Terrorism and Extortion (AiCTE) issued a notice saying, 

“Admission to PGDM programs shall be conducted by the respective state governments through their competent authority designated for such purpose”. 

In the event, no such competent authority was designated and the state govt. did nothing. SBS and other genuine MBA institutes waited….and waited….and waited, for such a competent authority to emerge, but it didn’t happen. And SBS and other institutes had to do their own admission process like earlier EARs. 

In short: AiCTE failed! 

Ha! Big deal! 

Bala Sir has already said that those students who are in panic can withdraw their fees and go back if they wish. I don’t think anyone or anything can be more fair than that! What more do you want? But how many are withdrawing? I don’t think even a single student is withdrawing. In this age of corruption and infinite scams, I think this is another skeem by AiCTE to make munny out of the student’s parent’s hard earned munny. 

And don’t bother about the name of the degree you get – PGDBM / PGCM / MBA / POPAT – or whatever. The name does not matter. I was professor for 10 years in BiTS Pilani, the top Engg. College in this hole cunt ree (I consider BiTS higher than IIT even though I am myself from IIT) and a degree in “Toilet cleaning Technology” from BiTS is better than a degree in Nuclear Physics from Ram Bharosay Institute of Technology which may be AiCTE approved. 

My final advice: RELAX. The sky is not falling down. Even if it does, wear the helmet. 

And Bala Sir is the Helmet! 

]]> (Dilip Bam) Education Sun, 19 Aug 2012 23:17:42 +0000

What is a Corporate Kutta?==CK ? Who is a CK ? Why is a CK ? How to identify a CK ? 

CK==Corporate + Kutta==TWO units. 1>Corporate. 2>Kutta. 

Let us take these two UNiTs – 0ne by 0ne. 

Since Kutta was on earth before Corporate=human , let us define Kutta first. Many of us might have had Kutta paL0-fied as pet in our house. I also have. I still have. Those who have kutta at home, know that kutta has to be provided PET-BHAR-Khana==stomach full QUANTiTY of food, by a particular Provider, at fixed times, at fixed intervals / durations, so that kutta can survive and thrive till the next time kutta is served food, and thus continue his mandated life as per LAW OF NATURE. In return for the food, the kutta will lick the face, ass and feet of the Provider and wag his tail to show his love and affection to his Provider. Those who have or had PaL0-ed Kutta, kn0 that they cannot lock the house and go away. The kutta will either perish (=die), or will become vagrant=awara=go where food get. 

This being the scenari0, let us separate the quantitative parameters of the above statement (=postulate== Law) from the qualitative parameters, and see if they can be applied to any other species who behave as per the above=postulate=Law. The quantitative parameters are QUANTiTY of food, fixed times & fixed intervals / durations. These are eminently quantifiable and measureable. Food – as in kg; fixed time (periodicity) as indicated in our watch / clock; and duration by time measuring / indicating instrument /device such as watch / clock for one day and calendar for days / weeks / months. 

Is this behavior pattern of kutta shown by any other species? In addition to studying dog, Dilip Bam has studied 0nly two other species: Cat & Human, mainly because Dilip Bam has kept many cats as pet for many years and had opportunity to study cat’s behavior in detail. Human was studied bkoz Dilip Bam considers himself as human, and has been interacting with countless other humans for 65 years. 

Comparing dog and cat, it is seen that they exhibit opposite behaviors & attitudes as follows: 

1. Dog wags tail to show happiness. Cat shakes tail to show anger & aggression. 

2. Dog behaves like servant & slave. Cat behaves as if it is house owner, and human is tenant. 

3. Dog is dependent on Provider. Cat is NOT dependent on provider or anybody else. 

If the three parameters of quantity, periodicity & duration are applied to corporate / govt. employees, what is the commonality? 

1. Quantity==CTC==cost to company or cost to govt. 

2. periodicity==Month==Monthly salary. 

3. Duration==Year==Yearly Appraisal. 

4. Provider==Corporate company or govt. 

So, just as DOG is faithful to the Provider who provides daily sustenance (=food & shelter) regularly. MBA works for corporate (=Provider), gets regular sustenance (salary) at regular interval (monthly), and is faithful to the corporate as long as regular sustenance (salary) keeps coming. 

As dog grows, its food requirement also increases. Similarly, as corporate rises in hierarchy, his requirement also increases. If the corporate matches the aspirations of its employee(s), they remain faithful. 

Mantra of Korporate Dog: “0 Korporate: My fealty and loyalty, my dedication and hard work are pledged to you till the next paycheck date. If the paycheck meeteth my expectation, my loyalty continueth.” 

Mantra of Korporate Dog cunt in youd: “As I rise and my aspirations rise, if thou cunt in you to meet and exceed them, I shall also cunt in you in you. Yet I reserve the right to cunt in you us ly expand my skope and use all skopes, inklooding TELEskope, MiCROskope, PERiskope, KALEiDOskope, STETH0skope etc. to widen my horizon and abandon you as soon as I find a more attraktiv Provider.” 

Everybody who enters even PopatLal Institute of Management Studies wants the ultimate job: Executive Assistant to Steve Jobs. Fcuk, I think even Bill Gates will apply for it – Steve Jobs may or may not accept. These are dreams, and without dreams there is nothing. 


1. Fixed timings: nine to five, ten to six whatever. 

2. SMS is more preferable than talk on fone, especially if you are going to say NO. 

3. They do NOT respond to inconvenient calls and they 99% do NOT return calls. 

4. Before carrying out any activity, look for as many as possible departments / people to get involved so that in case of problem or failure there are many people available to blame. 

5. When anybody giving verbal instructions and asking you to write down, better ask instructor to himself write so that any mistakes in writing can be blamed on writer, not follower. 

]]> (Dilip Bam) Education Sun, 19 Aug 2012 23:16:36 +0000

MBA / PGDBM / PGDM is the flavor of the season. In fact, MBA has been the favorite flavor of countless past seasons. The most important thing in an MBA is BRAND, which is to say not all MBAs are equal. To wit, an MBA from say XLRI or IIM-A would be light years ahead of any Pune MBA, even Symbiosis, in starting salary. Even an MBA from Pune’s top colleges such as BIMM of Sri Balaji Society or SIBM of Symbiosis would be leagues ahead of an MBA from say Ram-Bharosay MBA College. Average XLRI MBA starting salary this year was ten lakhs, while the average for a top Pune college is @ one-third of that. Similarly the starting salary difference between abovementioned top Pune colleges and run-of-the-mill colleges would again be one-third, i.e. the starting salary for a fresh MBA from a not so well known college would be @ 10,000/- per month. 

MBA tuition fees alone, at even just started colleges in Pune, with hardly any infrastructure are @ Rs. 2,50,000/- per year (plus 12.5% service tax plus 1% education cess). Add to this other associated fees and living costs for two years, an MBA needs to spend over six lakhs over two years. This is quite expensive. Yet is it worth the money and the time? 

Be that as it may, there are alternatives. Many specific industries have lately been released from the government’s socialist clutches. Industries such as insurance, retail, telecom, media, real estate and many others have been thrown open not only to Indian corporates but even to foreign direct investors (FDI). There has been an investment boom. Our growth rate for 2011-2012 is projected at almost 8.75%. Inflation notwithstanding, there is a surge of growth fuelling a large demand for suitably trained, industry-specific, manpower. 

As the late Peter Drukker, the world’s top management guru said, “An MBA is suited for just one job: Executive Vice-President in waiting”. This waiting period usually lasts about 20 years for those who eventually make it there – most don’t. 

In the MBA’s quest for the Executive Vice-President slot, he generally moves from company to company and industry to industry and ends up becoming just that – a generalist. 

Is it worth spending two years of your life and six lakh Rupees to land a Rs.10,000/- per month job? Most people would probably say it isn’t. So, what is the alternative? The alternative is short duration industry specific courses in retail, insurance, real estate and so on. 

The classic Indian education system was designed by Lord Macaulay to produce clerks for the East India Company. For this, he established three universities in 1857 viz., Bombay, Calcutta and Madras. While the top management of the East India Company (EIC) was with British people like Robert Clive and Warren Hastings, the top clerks of the EIC were Indian brown sahibs, graduates of the above universities who had to go to England to write another exam known as ICS, now called IAS, to become top dogs. Lower down the line were the Babus. 

The first Babu was Gobind Ram Mitter and the last Babu was Bhuban Mohan Niyogi. Though the core business of the EIC as per the charter granted to it by the King of England was TRADE, in effect, after Robert Clive defeated Nawab Sirajudaullah at Plassey (Bengal) on 23 June, 1757, the EIC became the ruler rather than a trader. 

Even after independence the system continued, with toppers of universities opting for an IAS career. The system continued because under Nehruvian socialism, all major industries and trade were govt. controlled. With the current liberalization and opening up of the economy (and the govt. sector drying up), there is now a great need for industry specific trained manpower. And this is where industry specific manpower training is stepping in. 

Short courses of six months or maximum 0ne year duration costing a fraction of MBA fees are the passport to a job. 

One of the most important factors for succeeding in a job is: DOMAiN KNOWLEDGE, and MBAs have no domain knowledge. The MBA institutes DO NOT teach any domain knowledge. 

So, do you want a Rs.15,000/- job after spending and six lakhs and two years? Or do you want a Rs.10,000/- job after spending fifty thousand and six months? 

In any case, MBA is most useful at entry level. As your career progresses, MBA becomes less and less important. Your performance in your previous job(s) becomes more and more important. For which the dominant factor is DOMAiN knowledge. Success is based on your ability to APPLY your domain knowledge. 

MBA does not create Ability. Ability is created by the environment in which you grow up. Ability is created by your parents, grandparents, friends, teachers and other factors (such as environment) while you are growing up. Your ability is more or less defined by the age of 15, by the time you finish class 12. 

Reliance was created by Dhirubhai. He was not much educated. He was a laborer in Yemen doing faltu job as filling petrol in vehicles. He was at ground level, not highly educated like his children. Yet he sent his children to do MBA in top colleges in US. But Dhirubhai had DOMAiN knowledge of how the system in India works. And he created wealth. 

By doing MBA, Mukesh and Anil learnt how to MAiNTAiN and increase wealth. Which is what they are doing. 


]]> (Dilip Bam) Education Sat, 18 Aug 2012 00:02:42 +0000